Monday, February 21, 2011

An idea

An idea changes the world.

Deng Xiaoping said: The colour of the cat does not matter as long as it catches mice." And see how the moribund dragon has recast itself. While it plays cat and mouse with the U.S. on yuan evaluation, it emerged as the big cat among the economies.

Well not all ideas are appreciated or realized so fast. Remember Copernicus? When he said the Earth rotated on its axis once daily and travelled around the Sun once yearly, he was ridiculed and incarcerated. And so was Galileo. Imagine the giggles their wives had to endure. And they themsleves in turn their wivies' frown for propounding the idea. How about Newton? What an idea? Why should apple fall down!!! These thoughts stray as they looked ushered in a revolution and enlightenment.
There are others who sell outlandish ideas to starry-eyed customers - like land on Moon. Really people should be men from Moon to buy this idea. On the other hand are the people who have blinkers. Mbkei, former South African President, believes there is no link between HIV and AIDS. His controversial HIV/AIDS policies caused the deaths of 365,000 people — including 35,000 babies — between 2000 and 2005, researchers at the US-based Harvard University have estimated.

Such things are not merely associated with the African states and voodoo practices. It's gasping to see that there is still a Flat Earth Society in the U.S. Yes. They still think that the Earth is flat. (http://www.alaska.net/~clund/e_djublonskopf/Flatearthsociety.htm). And they think we are living in Dark Ages to think that it is not!!!
People have queer ideas about UFOs - extraterrestrial matter. Sometimes it emerges they are new types of (spy) planes being tested by advanced countries. And that's all.
Often people end with their foot in the mouth like New Zealand’s Prime Minister John Key who described British actress and estranged wife of Indian business tycoon Arun Nayar, Liz Hurley, as "hot".
Women’s rights campaigners said the remarks were “boorish”. The sexist row erupted after Key was asked on a radio show if he would like to be Australian cricket star Shane Warne. He replied: “Yeah, well, given his current liaisons with Liz Hurley. I reckon she’s hot.”
The father-of-two, who is married to his childhood sweetheart, Bronagh, went on to name the 45-year—old actress as a “definite” dream date.
Key, who has two teenagers, Stephie and Max, said in his dream date top three Hurley was “a definite”, especially as she’s only “slightly older“. Warne’s and Hurley’s names came up after Key was first asked what sporting star he would like to be. He said he wouldn’t mind being Tiger Woods —— for the money.
But then he added, perhaps hinting at Tiger’s list of women friends, “there are other benefits that clearly come with the job.” (courtesy: PTI)
Some are sheer audacious. See the very gestation of the idea - that they can hoodwink the mighty American intelligence, hijack so many planes and crash them - nay the whole world's economy - into such vital installations. Abhorrent the act is though. The world is never the same again.
Some others are quite stupid. Consider this. Pakistani extremist leaders, including JuD chief Hafiz Saeed, have stepped up calls for jihad against India, even advocating the use of nuclear weapons if needed in the “war for Kashmir“. The effects will wipe out both the nations and what these stupid people want they will not survive to enjoy.
Some others are unintended puns. Outside a secondhand shop: We exchange anything - bicycles, washing machines, etc. Why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?!
Some others are quite fantastic. One is laying roads that move - walkalators - to avoid congestion - read during schol times. Aldous Huxley?
It's sheer lack of thought for others' sensitivity like these folks peeing right in front of the passengers as the train passes by. Unabashed creatures. The idea of hero bashing baddies without as much as a drop of sweat is sheer ridiculous.
Very many times the affinity, the values change. Earlier people thought they belonged to Earth and flourished. Now people think the other way. Accumulate huge tracts, leave them untilled and grumble about food prices.
Some leave a bitter taste in your mouth. India's chances went for a toss when Chetan Sharma bowled full toss to Miandad - feversih moment.
It was a national shame when Ramar Pillai made us believe that he could soak some herbs in water and convert it into oil which can be used to run a combustion engine. It proved to be just well gas.
And they are those die-hard fans. Like Tamil Nadu politician Vaiko who thinks LTTE supremo Prabakaran is still alive!!!

Thursday, January 13, 2011

a fast one

politicians are very fast in pulling a fast one on the public by going on fasts. their hunger for publicity is such after all. when they take up the cause of the trodden, they ensure it appears above the fold in the newspapers.
fasting as a weapon was of course invented by the Mahatma. the skeletal images of the indians esp rural folk, stirred him. but the modern politicians don't have the stomach for such unto-death fasts. they have invented relay hunger strike - that is fast till the food he had is digested and hand over the baton to the next man who just had his lunch. the post-mortem of a leader, who was murdered during one such fast, it was widely rumoured, showed he had idlis a few hours before the assassination.
look at the recent launch of such one by former Andhra Pradesh ex-chief minister chandrababu naidu - suicide by a farmer stirred his conscience and he launched a fast. soon his rivals plunged head on into the act. if they are so concerned let them till the land along with the farmers to highlight the problem. instead they till the fertile vote ground. the hunger of the poor is the fodder for their survival.
of course the one tamil nadu chief minister karunanidhi undertook was the acme of the vaudeville. the way his two wives - one sat at at his head and and the other at his feet - and competed to serve him in full glare, a spectacle indeed. the real cause is gobbled up. millions go sans a meal, as the mealy-mouthed politicians solganeer.
every year the government reels out statistics on shining india only to induce a reeling sensation among the distressed. the poor continue to eat a humble pie. the question what's cooking elicits (apart from the figurative sense) an empty stare - simply because nothing is cooking. for many, the meal is simply coarse grains, pour water and add salt. this gruel - a watered down version of food - is their staff of life. a pickle is a luxury and vegetables not even a dream. for them aphorisms like "The right time to eat is: for a rich man when he is hungry, for a poor man when he has something to eat" are meaningless. this leads to crime and in fact many people prefer the hardships of jail so that they would get something to eat. many a time, the rumble in the stomach gains traction as grumble and tumbles the governments - remember let them eat cake grandstanding?
the government has introduced shops to sell food at subsidised prices. for many, the ration shop has no rationale - after all they don't have the means to buy the articles.
while some people are forced to go empty stomach, others prefer to go so by choice. there was this actress who would spread all kinds of dishes, desserts, ice creams - quite mouthwatering - on the table and well simply watch them. afterall pencil-thin figure is importantna? instead of eating, they apply cheese, honey, vanilla extracts and eggs on their face and skin!
empty stomachs evoke sympathy. this leads to charity. read this story. every year in some american town, the school organises charity drive. the students collect food items and keep them safe in the school because of the threat from a poor white neighbourhood nearby. then they send it to the native Indian tribes. once one of the boys meets a native indian at a soccer match. the native thanks this boy for the food items but wonders how they eat a particular yoghurt item. the boy is puzzled and asks what they do with the yoghurt stuff. well, said the Indian. we have our own charity drive. we always send it to the poor white neighbourhood near your school!!
i sign offf beffore your appetite goes down.

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Foot-age

u cannot shoe it away anymore. throwing a shoe as a form of protest has dug its heels in. it all started with the former american president bush and the recent victim was the former australian premier kevin rudd. in between of course our own minister chidambaram faced it. the rash of these incidents is keeping the policemen on their toes. u cannot insist on people coming barefoot as it violates a cultural code of conduct - we cannot imagine to stand on our feet without them.

It will soon become fashion. if one is not thrown at you, your stock goes down that much. in fact u can sponsor it - as they do garlands - and pardon your foot soldiers to gain mileage or rather "foot" age. if it is lotto or some branded one, your stock goes up that much. though u would foot the bill, u should not pay him upfront lest he should take to his heels with the money. but train him enough so that it only passes by but actually does not hit u. in any case u better give him new ones so that even if it hits u won't lose your face! if it someoneelse's the disgrace is worse after all.
but not even a minute should u think that the other man will reboot his policies. while some people thickskinned as they are will say - my foot (i beg your pardon) and go ahead their unabashed ways, some others will be put on their backfoot only for sometime. they may in fact dismiss u a "loafer". whatever it is, the footrule is not to get slippered.
On the brighter side, this shows that the economy is not in recession - that they are not on shoe-string budget and can afford to throw them away!
not all are caught on flat foot when a shoe is thrown at them. Take the example of Madan Mohan Malaviya. when he wanted to start the Benares Hindu University, he approached the Nizam of hyderabad (then reputedly the richest man in the world). an incensed nizam threw a shoe at him. instead of taking offence, he cashed on it as history would tell us.
The City of Marikina is known as the Shoe Capital of the Philippines. no wonder its former First Lady imelda marcos fell head over heels over footwear. she gave a freekick to those who criticised her for indulging on foot fetish amid stinking poverty.
not all people buy shoes to wear them. ask those regions in china. the moment a model is released - lotto or vuitton or some such thing - they buy them only to rip it off, take a close look and prodcue lookalikes!!
well i have dragged my feet enough on this issue. before my readers become "slippery". let me post this.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

sticky wicket

for many rain is welcome . the smell of earth after the first few drops is scintillating. rain is quite egalitarian - the rich and the poor are equally effected/benefited by it.
Egalitarian. nearly so. ask the pedestrians whose dress is spoilt by the speeding swanky cars.
that brings us to the roads. somehow, civic bodies time laying roads with the onset of monsoon. it's really an obstacle course. whole stretches are often washed away. at many places, manholes are opened to drain the water. good samaritans keep a flagstaff to warn of the danger. somtimes mischief-mongers remove it to cause well mischief.
beyond roads, the subways are motorists'nightmare. people nearby make a fast buck in pushing the vehicles out.
children splash in poodles much to the consternation of moms. many children throw away their raincoat hat - the coat itself if they can help - and make a dash for the pitterpatter. not children alone. but the young - those who don't dye of course - enjoy the rain - very often u see their pix in newspapers. why photographers pick only girls enjoying the showers is quite comprehensible. colorful umbrellas are out. the plight of those whose button sticks and the umb does not open is pitiable. esp in places like mumbai where the second btw rain and opening umb is very crucial as the drops pick up momentum in no time. (Umb are also money minting source. when asked why they spent so much on them for Commonwealth Games, the organisers said they are waterproof umbs!!!!) not all of course have duckbacks. polythene covers for rickshawpullers and for some others broken plastic buckets would do.
as rain falls, so do temperatures and tempers. but is no dampner on stomach. it in fact spurs tastebuds - demand for hot pakodas, samosas and bhelpuri would be high. if it's a holiday, the housewife has to put up with demands of tea - it really (d)rains her.
the plants rejoice even before it rains. in fact they herald them. afterall, rain water is to them what mother's milk is to the baby.
It always does not rain water - there are instances of raining crocodiles and frogs. the best of course was when it rained coins. the worst of course is the acid rain. the icebergs - very tasty and this writer and his sisters had great fun in collecting them.
rain per se is welcome but the thunder activity is not esp during nights - the spl effects render many sleepless. but if there is no rain ther's no rainbow.

rain also has its share of jokes. esp weathermen are often on a sticky wicket. Another is a bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask it back when it begins to rain.

not all are down if it rains cats and dogs. in fact oxymoron as it is a depression lifts the farmers' spirits. rain is very essential to a still predominantly agrarian society like us. in fact the first thing people talk is weather and veg rates. the next concern is the reservoirs' position. instead of augmenting the water position by strengthening and enlarging reservoirs and store it against a rainy day, they overflow, water is discharged into sea and a little later there is water crisis. weather sats have been launched to predict the direction and quantum of rain. but after the first showers people make heavy weather of it - what with flees, flies and muddy roads.
When i was child it's quite sunny if it remained cloudy for a longtime. there was an elderly woman near our house who would not eat without sighting sun. a very hot time for her. after a couple of days she would be too tired to come out and peek every other minute. so she would offer payasam to whoever breaks the news first that the sun broke out. really it was a sweet time!!!

hiatus

well started as ususual and like many with enthu but developed cold feet after a few posts. not that i hit what they called the writer's block - megalomania. can blame it on domestic preoccupations - but plain laziness. i took myself to task for that and would like to take the task earnestly. seriously many say but my take is sincerely. anyhow it cannot be serious since it goes against the very grain of this blog. with these few remarks to my - mostly imagination - readers, i remain.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

intestinal fortitude

Well, nobody has the stomach to admit that he has, well, a stomach.
Stomach. The first person you remember is Lord Ganesh. His worshippers say the big stomach represents that of the Society - worshipping it is respect for the other man's - all men and women - hunger and needs.
But not all people's belly is that altrustic - for eg, lalu's provides us with fodder for thought!
There are some who reduce theirs to a dumping yard. Whenever, whatever they lay their hands on will see its way down the oesephagus. There are some who are simply arrested at the sight/smell of boiling oil - be it jilebi or pakoda. They believe in Jonathan Swift who said, "Better belly burst than good liquor be lost." You will be tongue-tied when you watch them gorge on. The safari shirt struggles to meet the hem of the trousers. If he wears a vest we are saved. Otherwise..the belly button stares at you.
(Belly button - exposure of which sexually revolutionised Indian cinema. Remember Helen gyrating with a chamki in it!).

On the other hand are the actresses who refuse to eat lest their pencil figure should get erased. One woman actor famously said she would spread the desserts on the table and only enjoys watching them. In some it assumes epidemic proportions (Lady Diana, peace be on her soul, was supposedly one) and leads to hospitalisation.
Many women lose their figure after wedding/pregnancies and also develop scars on tummies. They wistfully recall their halcyon days and squarely blame their husbands for the distended tummy though they are also partners in the game. But read this: I have a little bit of a belly, a tiny bit of pooch. It's the one thing I don't want to lose. I just like having some softness. If I lose that, then Tom might leave me. - Nicole Kidman.
With health awareness growing, people fall flat for tips on well a flat stomach. And there are a dime a dozen who proffer them. Many say a morning brisk walk will melt the fats and there is nothing to beat it. Yet many people cannot walk the talk for the simple reason of being too lazy to get up early. They simply don't have the fire in their belly to burn the fats. But push-ups have a leg up over morning walk, some aver. On the other hand are those who strive for six-pack abs with a killer instinct. Their gut feeling is now or never.
There are those who cannot digest the fact that they should avoid ice-creams. Their resolve simple melts away at the first whiff of the parlour. You are what you do not eat. Many villagers tell their doctors that they cannot avoid eating thick curd to round off their meals despite their sugar levels. Yet some cannot avoid red meat ignoring doctor's red signal.
Excess fat is bad not only for humans. Banks go belly up with the fat of debt and NPAs.

While some suffer from a convex belly, many people go empty stomach. Well i think we have intestinal fortitude for only this much, I think. I sign off.

Monday, April 26, 2010

choli ke piche

At a convocation ceremony in Bhopal, Minister Jairam Ramesh threw the dress down. Was it an instantaneous decision or he gave a dress rehearsal at home before giving the gown a dressing down? But he should be given credit for ad'dressing' the issue threadbare.
Dress of course has always been an emotive issue. Jairam is not the first one to throw out the foreign yoke. Much before him in a poltical statement - the Mahatma called for throwing away foreign clothes. and made a bon fire of it too.
And in Europe, the scarf is creating a storm as many governments want to ban it. Many organisations are unleashing "veiled" threats over the ban for many the scarf is not just a religious symbol but a question of identity. Or an assertion against state authority - a revolutionary gesture. A girl who decides to wear scarf in Orhan Pamuk's Snow says: "...what i was doing was worthwhile not as a defence of Islam but as defiance of the state.'
identity yes. in fact some dresses are identified with some people and if u see them u will remember the personality - the Mahatma's loincloth, Sri Radhakrishnan's turban, Zinna's suit.
Dress is not merely cloth. By the way one attires him/herself, you can tell which community they belong to, which region they hail from. While there are those Indians who cover their bodies with a sari - which is often said reveals as much as it hides - the westerns have a bare all approach. But the government could not bear this and banned the ftv. And if u follow someone else's mode, u would have some trouble - like the girls who cannot lift their hand in sleeveless gowns or blouses.
How to dress is a fast-changing dynamic. The joke was in Paris a woman was running home from a tailor shop. When asked the reason, she said by the time i go and wear this dress, it may become outdated. So fickle it could be. Did not Oscar Wilde say, “Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.”
Not only the dress, but the undergarments too undergo change. While men (at least in South India) no longer wear trunks (loose shorts with a safety pocket - very odd when they shuffle the dhoti to remove money or bidis from it), gone were the stifling corsets. A frenzy of speculation ensues before Oscars or Filmfare awards - what the dolls wear - how much or how less. The Presidents' and Premiers' wives are constantly exposed to media glare. It's ok to guess/discuss what they wear, but wondering or speculating what's inside could be controversial - the song cholikepiche kya hai has raised such a storm.
Not all people are very particular of their dress. There is this character in a Hollywood film, where Unrsulla Andress sheds her dress so often- at the least "provocation" - that i wondered if she should be called ursulla undress.
Clothing also tells where people stand. U may strut in duckback, but many people make do with polythene covers to save their heads from rain. While some wear designer dresses, for some life has not altered much - they wear shirts and trousers of their fathers/uncles/brothers altered to their size.
Dress is a fashion statement - but parents know they should skirt the issue of selection when their issues grow up. The younger ones know what is in vogue and decide for themselves. Parents better pay and look the other way.
But principals of many Chennai engineering colleges may not agree with this. They wrapped up the issue long back - no t-shirts or jeans allowed and gals - only chudidhar. Violators may not be defrocked. But they are not only fined but their paretns have to go and stand before the managements with their heads down.